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Salad is Stupid

Salad is Stupid
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  • Salad is Stupid

    Post #1 - August 29th, 2004, 3:39 pm
    Post #1 - August 29th, 2004, 3:39 pm Post #1 - August 29th, 2004, 3:39 pm
    Salad is Stupid

    I like a good slaw, pig neck larb, melange of sea vegetables with sushi, boiled greens, and perhaps crudites with pate.

    What gets my goat are the elephantine leaves of iceberg, romaine, bib, etc., chopped willy-nilly into a bowl and dowsed with oil. It'd be hard to imagine a less imaginative dish, barely a step up, I think, from a fistful of Savannah grass seasoned with animal fat, a recipe drawn directly from the Australopithecus cookbook.

    Salad is "good for you," I know, I know, and I will admit that one needs some rough fiber to ream out the guts every now and again. But I take salad as I would a pill, and I defy anyone to explain the wisdom of eating salad before the meal, which puts the leaves down first, as a "foundation" though more like a barricade, the sturdy sheaves standing arms akimbo to block the passage of the meal to come. I believe American restaurants serve salad first just to get it out of the way; they throw some salad to the customers so they'll munch while the kitchen gains a few more minutes to microwave the pasta. Europeans frequently take salad after the meal, and that at least makes some physiological sense, though I'm not sure why anyone would eat food that is generally recognized as "hard to digest" (as confirmed by the National Center for Policy Analysis, http://www.ncpa.org/iss/reg/2003/pd042103f.html).

    Salad, the dieter's supposed first line of defense, is usually high-calorie stuff. Most of us, of course, willingly chow down on high-calorie food if the flavor justifies the richness of the repast. Salad, with characteristically cruel irony, delivers all the calories with little compensatory flavor. McDonald's, one of my very favorite restaurants (I'm lovin' it, really, I am), serves a Fiesta Salad that clocks in at 460 calories; heck, I'd rather have a delicious, grill-fresh Quarter-Pounder (430 calories) or TWO bags of golden brown World-Famous French Fries (220 calories each), all of which come in at less on the calorie scale than the salad. (For more helpful information about how McDonald's food fits into a balanced diet, or to learn how to customize your own McDonald's meal to maximize the nutritional values, check out http://www.mcdonalds.com/usa/eat.html).

    Salad is sloppy. Unlike Holly Moore and the illustrious VI, I fail to see the strange honor in oily track marks across my chest. I've ruined a silk farm worth of ties from eating irregular leaves, each hiding dripping stalactites of oily resin released as though on command from some insidious higher power just as the forkful of goopy vegetation is nearing my mouth. I refuse to fling my tie over my shoulder like a demented earth-bound aviator when having salad; I'm just not going to have salad. Sloppy problem solved.

    Salad renders the beautiful unattractive. How many times have I been having dinner with some gorgeous woman, only to see her otherwise comely features contorted grotesquely as her mouth gaps open like some starving weasel's to quickly cram in a misshapen four-to-five inch shred of cream-splattered leaf, followed by a complacent bovine glassiness of the eyes as she chomps fronds, mindlessly monstrously masticating. The effect, to say the least, is chilling. Maybe it's a good thing salad is served first; if it came after the meal, the recent memory of such a disturbing display would put the kybosh good and hard on any apres dinner amorousness. In ways such as these, salad could spell the end of the species.

    Salad is clearly very dangerous, of course, in the short-term, as well. If not kept at exactly the right temperature, it can be a clear and present danger to anyone of us who eats it. The US Department of Agriculture warns that if salad sat at room temperature for any length of time, the Salmonella would multiply to dangerous numbers (http://www.fsis.usda.gov/OA/background/bksalmon.htm). The person who eats the salad then also eats the bacteria and becomes ill. I don't eat fugu (because those who eat fugu are stupid, see http://www.destroy-all-monsters.com/fugu.shtml) or eyeball taco (at least not anymore; learn more about eating eyeballs and contracting Creutzfeldt-Jakob at http://www.columbia.edu/cu/21stC/issue-2.1/debened.htm). A food would have to be damn tasty to get me to risk my life for it, and raw blowfish, greasy eyeballs and salmonella-laced salad are simply insufficiently delicious to place one's life on the line to "enjoy" them. Is it really worth eating these foods and putting yourself at risk of immediate paralysis and death? Do you prefer, perhaps, to eat lettuce only to face a slow and painful decline into mad cow-like dementia? Would you actually commit suicide for the sake of a salad? How can you even ask such questions? Are you completely and irretrievably insane!?

    Anyhow, I got no beef with raw vegetables. My gorge and rage rise specifically when seated before the green salad: the bowl overflowing with hard-to-digest, oily leaves, full of empty calories and crawling with bacteria. The Wife, of course, loves the stuff, which is an excellent example of another thing that gets my goat: the iron-clad stolidity of those who cling to fashionable falsehood even when the clear light of (well-documented) truth shines the way to perfect wisdom and enlightenment, which so few of us, it seems, possess.

    David "Crying in the Wilderness" Hammond
  • Post #2 - August 30th, 2004, 9:16 am
    Post #2 - August 30th, 2004, 9:16 am Post #2 - August 30th, 2004, 9:16 am
    David:

    Here are some thoughts on and reactions to your hate speech against salad (still, luckily, not prosecutable under federal law):

    ***

    "Salad is sloppy... Salad renders the beautiful unattractive..."

    For some reason, many restaurateurs and too many private citizens have taken the approach to salad making that entails putting, as you put it, elephantine leaves of greens in their salads... This combined with some sort of strange prejudice against or fear of using a knife on salad which contains grotesquely large elements does result in precisely the ungainly transformation of even the finest of faces into visages more reminiscent of Flossy the Cow and Mr. Ed (no gender bias on my part!).


    An easy remedy... If you're making a salad, tear the pieces into small and mouth-manageable pieces... If you're served a salad with elements sized for the trough, pull out a knife and render them less aesthetically dangerous.

    ***

    "... I'm not sure why anyone would eat food that is hard to digest..."

    It's been a long time since I studied physiology but I believe one of the benefits of eating salad after the main course of a meal is that it helps move other things along. Eating salad before dinner, at least a basic sort of a salad (as opposed to certain special first-course-like salads), seems to me weird and pointless... I grew up eating salad always with the main (second) course or after the main course. Coming at that point in the meal, it apparently does have demonstrably good effects on digestion and in addition, if one is having the right kind of salad, it helps cleanse the palate.

    ***

    "Salad, the dieter's supposed first line of defense..."

    Tied to the the final point in the preceding paragraph is the following: There has developed in this country an excessive fondness for rich and crassly flavoured salad dressings. Perhaps all the Ranches and Blue Cheeses and Creamy Italians and Russians and whatever else are all very delicious, but precisely because they are by taste assertive and by fat (and salt and sugar) content caloric and not intended as health food, salad dressed with such things should to my mind be eaten only once in a while and then as a real course of a meal if not as the meal itself.

    Salad, day-in day-out, work-a-day, blue-collar (and for that matter white-collar) salad, the kind of salad that is just a delicious and refreshing little solid digestif that helps cleanse the palate, that should be a very simple salad dressed very simply. Olive oil, lemon or vinegar, a little salt and pepper... That's functional and elegant and good.

    And if one loves olive oil, a simply dressed salad is an excellent way to enjoy that flavour of uncooked oil.

    And if one loves bread and has access to really good bread, a simply dressed salad is an excellent way to enjoy that flavour of uncooked oil together with good bread.

    ***

    Some complex salads are glorious dishes. A well made Greek village salad (without lettuce!), with the best quality ingredients, is one of the most refreshing and tasty dishes known to mankind...

    The southern Italian salad of fennel and red onion and orange slices and olives... a bit of alchemical genius...

    A salad of Belgian endive with apple and nuts and lardons and blue cheese...

    A salade Niçoise...

    A nopalito salad...

    These are simply outstanding dishes.

    ***

    To me, one of the best accompaniments to roasted or grilled meat is some manner of slightly assertive and minimally dressed (or 'totally nude', as Jacques Pepin might say), single green (e.g., rocket, watercress, cress, endive, etc.) or simple salad combination. The contrast of cool and crisp and tangy with the hot and fatty softness of the flesh is a combination made in heaven.

    This is the reasoning that lies behind the garnishing of tacos and kebab sandwiches and, for that matter, hamburgers. The salad is placed in the bread with the meat.

    ***

    Bacteria? Schmacteria. Would I eat raw vegetables in a place where sanitation and water pollution are problems? No.

    Would I eat shellfish drawn from questionable sea water? No.

    Would I eat meat from a place where the animals are often carriers of a disease that can be transmitted to humans? No.

    Would I eat anything in a place where I knew the employees don't wash their hands? No.

    ***

    Salad, like anything else, can be good or bad, depending on who is making it.

    Antonius
    Alle Nerven exzitiert von dem gewürzten Wein -- Anwandlung von Todesahndungen -- Doppeltgänger --
    - aus dem Tagebuch E.T.A. Hoffmanns, 6. Januar 1804.
    ________
    Na sir is na seachain an cath.
  • Post #3 - August 30th, 2004, 9:40 am
    Post #3 - August 30th, 2004, 9:40 am Post #3 - August 30th, 2004, 9:40 am
    Usually I do not use anything leafy.Rarely I add escarole or spinach.Small pieces.I have read that our teeth and digestive system are designed for herbivores.
  • Post #4 - August 30th, 2004, 10:00 am
    Post #4 - August 30th, 2004, 10:00 am Post #4 - August 30th, 2004, 10:00 am
    hattyn wrote:Usually I do not use anything leafy.Rarely I add escarole or spinach.Small pieces.I have read that our teeth and digestive system are designed for herbivores.


    Designed to eat herbivores, you mean ;)

    Man is, and always has been, an omnivore, just like our ape ancestors and cousins.

    A good writeup of the available evidence can be found here:

    http://www.beyondveg.com/billings-t/com ... t-9a.shtml
    Ed Fisher
    my chicago food photos

    RIP LTH.
  • Post #5 - August 30th, 2004, 10:06 am
    Post #5 - August 30th, 2004, 10:06 am Post #5 - August 30th, 2004, 10:06 am
    gleam wrote:Man is, and always has been, an omnivore, just like our ape ancestors and cousins.


    Hey now, Ed, watch it. You can call me anything you want but leave my family out of it!

    :D

    A
    Alle Nerven exzitiert von dem gewürzten Wein -- Anwandlung von Todesahndungen -- Doppeltgänger --
    - aus dem Tagebuch E.T.A. Hoffmanns, 6. Januar 1804.
    ________
    Na sir is na seachain an cath.
  • Post #6 - August 30th, 2004, 10:54 am
    Post #6 - August 30th, 2004, 10:54 am Post #6 - August 30th, 2004, 10:54 am
    gleam wrote:
    hattyn wrote:Usually I do not use anything leafy.Rarely I add escarole or spinach.Small pieces.I have read that our teeth and digestive system are designed for herbivores.


    Designed to eat herbivores, you mean ;)



    Ed, Designed to eat omnivores, don't you mean? (http://lthforum.com/bb/viewtopic.php?t=633)

    Hammond :twisted:
  • Post #7 - August 30th, 2004, 11:09 am
    Post #7 - August 30th, 2004, 11:09 am Post #7 - August 30th, 2004, 11:09 am
    Whatever your beliefs (God ,Mother Nature, etc) produce has more variety and way back when, yes time apparently existed before me,meat was hard to obtain.I do not think God thought we were smart enough to make tools and fire.Or maybe it is just me who isn't.Had you any omnivores in mind?
  • Post #8 - August 30th, 2004, 11:30 am
    Post #8 - August 30th, 2004, 11:30 am Post #8 - August 30th, 2004, 11:30 am
    hattyn wrote:Whatever your beliefs (God ,Mother Nature, etc) produce has more variety and way back when, yes time apparently existed before me,meat was hard to obtain.I do not think God thought we were smart enough to make tools and fire.Or maybe it is just me who isn't.Had you any omnivores in mind?


    Cooking meat is a relatively new convention.. carnivores and omnivores have existed for eons without a weber grill in sight :)

    and even today we'll eat raw meat. steak tartare, beef carpaccio, sushi, kibbeh with raw ground beef...

    And david was proposing consuming humans.

    A modest proposal.
    Ed Fisher
    my chicago food photos

    RIP LTH.
  • Post #9 - August 30th, 2004, 11:48 am
    Post #9 - August 30th, 2004, 11:48 am Post #9 - August 30th, 2004, 11:48 am
    gleam wrote:
    and even today we'll eat raw meat. steak tartare, beef carpaccio, sushi, kibbeh with raw ground beef...


    I used to enjoy steak tartare, but it's also one of those things I just don't touch anymore. It's just not worth the risk... and I don't like it THAT much.

    David
  • Post #10 - August 30th, 2004, 11:50 am
    Post #10 - August 30th, 2004, 11:50 am Post #10 - August 30th, 2004, 11:50 am
    Antonius wrote:
    gleam wrote:Man is, and always has been, an omnivore, just like our ape ancestors and cousins.


    Hey now, Ed, watch it. You can call me anything you want but leave my family out of it!

    :D

    A


    A, remind me to tell you the joke about the Italian organ grinder and the monkey.

    Hammond
  • Post #11 - August 30th, 2004, 11:52 am
    Post #11 - August 30th, 2004, 11:52 am Post #11 - August 30th, 2004, 11:52 am
    David Hammond wrote:
    gleam wrote:
    and even today we'll eat raw meat. steak tartare, beef carpaccio, sushi, kibbeh with raw ground beef...


    I used to enjoy steak tartare, but it's also one of those things I just don't touch anymore. It's just not worth the risk... and I don't like it THAT much.

    David


    oh, it's not my bag at all. nor is kibbeh with ground beef.

    but i'll do carpaccio and beef sashimi willingly..

    -ed
    Ed Fisher
    my chicago food photos

    RIP LTH.
  • Post #12 - August 30th, 2004, 12:07 pm
    Post #12 - August 30th, 2004, 12:07 pm Post #12 - August 30th, 2004, 12:07 pm
    David Hammond wrote:I used to enjoy steak tartare, but it's also one of those things I just don't touch anymore. It's just not worth the risk... and I don't like it THAT much.


    Yeah, but it's really good if you're drunk and plan to keep drinking... At least if you're in Belgium... It used to be available at little snack shops that were open all night... I don't know if that's still the case... They've been shutting down the old frituurs and snack-shacks like mad in recent years...

    Anyway, I heard that steak tartare is good if you're drinking... I wouldn't know myself.

    :wink:

    A
    Alle Nerven exzitiert von dem gewürzten Wein -- Anwandlung von Todesahndungen -- Doppeltgänger --
    - aus dem Tagebuch E.T.A. Hoffmanns, 6. Januar 1804.
    ________
    Na sir is na seachain an cath.
  • Post #13 - August 30th, 2004, 12:11 pm
    Post #13 - August 30th, 2004, 12:11 pm Post #13 - August 30th, 2004, 12:11 pm
    A, there are some foods that I would not consider consuming without some form of alcohol accompaniment. Sea urchin would be one.

    Hammond

    PS. And street urchin would be another :twisted:
  • Post #14 - August 30th, 2004, 12:20 pm
    Post #14 - August 30th, 2004, 12:20 pm Post #14 - August 30th, 2004, 12:20 pm
    H:

    Street urchin, card shark, lounge lizard, chauvinist pig, snake in the grass, bar-fly, weasel, rat, bookworm and, of course, grease-monkey are all meats that are best eaten cooked, I should think.

    A
    Alle Nerven exzitiert von dem gewürzten Wein -- Anwandlung von Todesahndungen -- Doppeltgänger --
    - aus dem Tagebuch E.T.A. Hoffmanns, 6. Januar 1804.
    ________
    Na sir is na seachain an cath.
  • Post #15 - August 30th, 2004, 12:27 pm
    Post #15 - August 30th, 2004, 12:27 pm Post #15 - August 30th, 2004, 12:27 pm
    David Hammond wrote:Salad, the dieter's supposed first line of defense, is usually high-calorie stuff. Most of us, of course, willingly chow down on high-calorie food if the flavor justifies the richness of the repast.

    Exactly. The reason I eat salad IS to gain weight. :wink: But seriously, it is a rare day that you find me eating a salad, and you will most certainly never find me ordering one. At a buffet, you may observe a small plate of greens pass through, but that's only at the end of the meal, if I didn't have one too many filets of fish already. (Hmm, maybe I should make a run to MickeyD's...) The main appeal of a salad (for me) lies in the creamy sauce sprinkled with bacon bits and the mini pieces of fruit that sneak in (your random cherry tomato or cantaloupe slice). So I guess it really is all about the flavor. All that cellulose can make things hard on the body, though.

    --
    I don't believe in salad.
  • Post #16 - August 30th, 2004, 1:09 pm
    Post #16 - August 30th, 2004, 1:09 pm Post #16 - August 30th, 2004, 1:09 pm
    David,

    First, thank you so much for annotating the nutrition information in your post with so many "quality" sources. I wish this website had a policy requiring every one to do the same.

    Your post questions the need to eat something that is hard to digest. Actually, although there are more topical sites to discuss the matter, not everything passing from bow to stern through the alimentary canal is "digested."

    Fiber is an indigestible complex carbohydrate found in plants. Fiber is not a single food or substance. Fiber in itself has no calories because the body cannot absorb it. Therefore, high fiber foods low in fat are low in calories such as fruits and vegetables. Fiber can be divided into two categories according to their physical characteristics and effects on the body: Water insoluble and water soluble. Each form functions differently and provides different health benefits. You can read more about fiber here:
    http://www.jhbmc.jhu.edu/cardiology/rehab/fiber.html

    So should we eat it if it is not digested?

    Current recommendations suggest that adults consume 20-35 grams of dietary fiber per day. Children over age 2 should consume an amount equal to or greater than their age plus 5 grams per day. On a daily average, Americans eat only 14-15 grams of dietary fiber. You can read more about the daily requirements of undigested fiber here:

    http://www.hsph.harvard.edu/nutritionsource/fiber.html

    Finally, David, while I know you are a graduate of Ronald's new math for nutrition, [maybe even had a hand in developing some of it ], it think those of us smarter than a salad can do the math on this one.

    I would suggest that I regularly see folks eat a McD's salad without a side order of fries for lunch, I can't say that I regularly see folks eat only a Quarter-Pounder and skip the fries. Not to mention that a Quarter-Pounder with Cheese comes in at 540 calories and a large fries (does anyone, but the ahppy meal ordering folks ever get a small fry anymore) comes in at 520 cal., that's over a grand in calories before the Supersized shake or corn syrup ladened beverage. Kudos to Ronald for at least providing nutritional information, even if it was to avoid litigation. You can read more about McNutri-hype here:
    http://www.mcdonalds.com/app_controller ... index.html

    While McDonald's has provided nutritional information there are several large scale restaurants that still haven't. Should you like to find out which ones do and those that don't (and even send a nasty email to those that don't) you can read more about them here at Ashely's Diabetes website: http://206.246.185.85/diabetes/restaurant.html

    I have a personal boycott going against Corner Bakery that has so far refused to provide nutrition information, while nutri-hyping their whole grain, healthy benefits cuisine.

    Unfortunately, for many of us (that includes me) our dining decisions are still driven by instant gratification and advertising.and you dare to call salad stupid?

    pd


    p.s. I think weasal's are cute
    Unchain your lunch money!
  • Post #17 - August 30th, 2004, 2:43 pm
    Post #17 - August 30th, 2004, 2:43 pm Post #17 - August 30th, 2004, 2:43 pm
    fastfoodsnob wrote:So I guess it really is all about the flavor. All that cellulose can make things hard on the body, though.

    --
    I don't believe in salad.


    fastfoodsnob,

    When I was in grad school, I was getting severe stomach pains. Went to doctor, doctor asked me, "What are you eating?" I said "I'm a vegetarian" (at that time, more an economic choice than anything else). She said, "Eat meat." I did, and since then I've never experienced that kind of abdominal pain again (nor have I been tempted to make vegetarianism a way of life). I love little animals; they're delicious.

    Hammond
  • Post #18 - August 30th, 2004, 3:24 pm
    Post #18 - August 30th, 2004, 3:24 pm Post #18 - August 30th, 2004, 3:24 pm
    Salad: a matter of perspective.

    When my mom was well along into her decline, in that phase of the condition when blissfully ignorant of cognitive dementia as we were that we weren't yet dealing with it (but in retrospect how could we possibly not have), she set dinner on the table and called us in from the condo's sun room to eat.

    We sat down. I poured the wine and surveyed the table.

    "Where's the salad?"

    Mom looked around the table. Broiled chicken, applesauce cooked up from MacIntosh apples and one other dish. Seconds passed. Mom pointed.

    "Pickles" she shot back. And damn good half-sour kosher pickles too.

    So maybe she was cooking chicken, but connecting with brisket?
    Chicago is my spiritual chow home
  • Post #19 - August 30th, 2004, 4:15 pm
    Post #19 - August 30th, 2004, 4:15 pm Post #19 - August 30th, 2004, 4:15 pm
    David Hammond wrote:When I was in grad school, I was getting severe stomach pains. Went to doctor, doctor asked me, "What are you eating?" I said "I'm a vegetarian" (at that time, more an economic choice than anything else). She said, "Eat meat."

    I have to say that Atkins (again, for me) is less of a diet; it's more of a lifestyle that I've come to thoroughly embrace. And that was before I'd ever heard of Atkins (or diets). But I've had some gut-level decisions to make in my life, too. After some surgery on my intestines, guess what the doctor prescribed? A low-fiber diet. Got meat?

    --The Snob
  • Post #20 - August 30th, 2004, 10:11 pm
    Post #20 - August 30th, 2004, 10:11 pm Post #20 - August 30th, 2004, 10:11 pm
    David, you're in good company in condemning the bowl of leaves. That well-known nutritionist, W.B. Yeats, wrote in 1921:
      It's certain that fine women eat
      A crazy salad with their meat
      Whereby the Horn of Plenty is undone.

    Antonius, the prejudice against cutting salad with a knife dates to a time when most knives had carbon-steel blades that could be damaged by a salad's acidic ingredients, and moreover, leave nasty brown stains on the lettuce. The rule of etiquette has survived this practicality, however, as well as -- in all but the most punctilious households -- the sharp-edged salad forks (let alone the black-bladed salad knives) one was supposed to use on the greens.

    My family, whose table was rooted in European peasant custom, served its salads as an accompaniment to the main course when we dined at home. I note that Australians, even in restaurants, also eat their salads with their meat. In the Netherlands, salads are typically composed salads of cooked vegetables rather than leafy greens, and they are usually a side dish as well (along with two kinds of potatoes!).

    Salad as a first course seems to have been an invention of restaurants in America, designed to give you something to do while they cook the rest of the meal. It also fills you up on cheaper vegetable matter before you get to the more costly protein portions of the meal. (When we dined at Fogo de Chao recently, I thought it was interesting that our waiter cautioned us not fill up at the salad bar.) For those on the low-fat sort of diet, this is considered a benefit. I have also seen explanations that salad as a starter gets the gastric juices flowing.

    I enjoy salads, at just about any part of the meal, but for me they are an uncommon treat. Like fastfoodsnob, I've been told I should eat a low-fiber diet. I don't exactly do that -- I just make certain that when I indulge in a salad, it's going to be one worth the pain.
  • Post #21 - August 30th, 2004, 10:42 pm
    Post #21 - August 30th, 2004, 10:42 pm Post #21 - August 30th, 2004, 10:42 pm
    LAZ wrote:David, you're in good company in condemning the bowl of leaves. That well-known nutritionist, W.B. Yeats, wrote in 1921:
      It's certain that fine women eat
      A crazy salad with their meat
      Whereby the Horn of Plenty is undone.


    Cast a cold eye on iceberg, on bib
    Salad server, pass by.
  • Post #22 - August 31st, 2004, 8:04 pm
    Post #22 - August 31st, 2004, 8:04 pm Post #22 - August 31st, 2004, 8:04 pm
    This, from a culinary enthusiast? This, from the man who has prepared for my sisters and me countless summer salads and pre-dinner veggies? THIS CARELESS BLOW TO FOOD-LOVERS EVERYWHERE, from the man I so long revered as an appreciator of all of nature's bounty? THIS... from my own father??? That's right folks, I am Lydia Berg-Hammond-- recently shamed daughter of the wild, raving David Hammond.

    C'mon Pop, you're really going to try to bash SALAD?

    Health benefits aside, salad is a delicious, crucial part of any good meal, no matter where it falls in the chronology of the dining experience. A fresh salad prepares the palate for the meal, refreshes it mid-meal, and calms the stomach after a hearty night of whatever greasy, fatty, beer-battered, sauce-smothered pound-and-a-half endulgence you're stuck on this week. Although the calorie arguement is a strong one, not everyone chooses salad as a wieght-loss plan. For example, at a recent lunch date with some gal pals in a fairly upscale Milwaukee restaurant, I ordered a Tuscan Smoked Chicken salad which included crisp romaine, shaved carrots, marinated chicken breast, walnuts, fresh green apples, creamy gorgonzola, and a light, but tastey, vinaigrette. It was delicious! The word "calorie" never even crossed my mind. While my lunch buddies rolled out of the booth feeling bloated and heavy after gorging on such college kid favorites as pizza and pasta, I hopped out feeling light and comfortable, but completely satisfied. You see, the salad is not simply a restaurant tool for keeping the customer busy while the meal is prepared, nor is it necessarily a diet item. The [correctly prepared] salad, with endless garnishing possiblities and myriad palate-pleasing capabilities, is really a gift to both health-conscious and sinfully endulgent consumers everywhere.
  • Post #23 - September 1st, 2004, 9:16 am
    Post #23 - September 1st, 2004, 9:16 am Post #23 - September 1st, 2004, 9:16 am
    Sharper than an adder's tooth...that's my kid! :lol:

    Hammond
  • Post #24 - September 1st, 2004, 9:54 am
    Post #24 - September 1st, 2004, 9:54 am Post #24 - September 1st, 2004, 9:54 am
    Lidso:

    The respect that I lost for your father as a result of his hate-speech against salad has been restored, insofar as he was, despite some strange -- even crack-pot -- culinary ideas, nevertheless able to raise an intelligent and eloquent daughter.

    Long live salad!

    Weasel for president!

    A

    P.S. Reward being offered for small monkey wearing colourful peasant garb and bearing tin cup. Monkey has long tail and responds to the name 'Gennarino'.
    Alle Nerven exzitiert von dem gewürzten Wein -- Anwandlung von Todesahndungen -- Doppeltgänger --
    - aus dem Tagebuch E.T.A. Hoffmanns, 6. Januar 1804.
    ________
    Na sir is na seachain an cath.
  • Post #25 - September 1st, 2004, 10:41 am
    Post #25 - September 1st, 2004, 10:41 am Post #25 - September 1st, 2004, 10:41 am
    See, when confronted by my daughter's depredations, I just figured my chow buddies would jump to my defense. Little did I know they would help embellish the "kick me" sign nailed to my backside. I understand and accept the sacrifices I make to speak the truth; hey, someday, maybe Mel Gibson will make a movie about me.

    Danne, I'm going to continue misspelling your name.

    Antonius, I've got your monkey, and he doesn't look very happy, though he does look...delicious.

    Hammond
  • Post #26 - September 1st, 2004, 10:57 am
    Post #26 - September 1st, 2004, 10:57 am Post #26 - September 1st, 2004, 10:57 am
    David Hammond wrote:Antonius, I've got your monkey, and he doesn't look very happy, though he does look delicious.

    Hammond


    Please, no! I'll double the reward and throw in a few pounds of medium Italian sausage to boot!!!

    He's not just a friend, he's a business partner!

    Gennari', Gennari'!!!

    A
    Alle Nerven exzitiert von dem gewürzten Wein -- Anwandlung von Todesahndungen -- Doppeltgänger --
    - aus dem Tagebuch E.T.A. Hoffmanns, 6. Januar 1804.
    ________
    Na sir is na seachain an cath.
  • Post #27 - September 1st, 2004, 9:46 pm
    Post #27 - September 1st, 2004, 9:46 pm Post #27 - September 1st, 2004, 9:46 pm
    Surely I can't be the only one for whom salad is an excuse for eating salt! (Doesn't the word "salad" even come from the Latin for "salted thing"?) It was in Italy that I first had salads consisting of an array of greens on a plate, sprinkled visibly with coarse salt. Now, I adorn my salads at home with Maldon salt.

    I loved the original post; it reminded me of WC Fields talking about water.
  • Post #28 - September 1st, 2004, 10:05 pm
    Post #28 - September 1st, 2004, 10:05 pm Post #28 - September 1st, 2004, 10:05 pm
    bibi rose wrote: (Doesn't the word "salad" even come from the Latin for "salted thing"?)


    yeah, salad comes, at the base, from sal and salare, salt and to salt respectively.

    that's also where we get "salary" and "worth your salt", since it was used to pay roman troops way back in the day.

    -ed
    Ed Fisher
    my chicago food photos

    RIP LTH.
  • Post #29 - September 2nd, 2004, 1:37 am
    Post #29 - September 2nd, 2004, 1:37 am Post #29 - September 2nd, 2004, 1:37 am
    bibi rose wrote:Surely I can't be the only one for whom salad is an excuse for eating salt!


    No, no, french fries are an excuse for eating salt!

    Potatoes of all kinds, actually. Try that Maldon on a baked spud. Be sure to rub the skin with salt before you bake it.
  • Post #30 - September 2nd, 2004, 4:08 am
    Post #30 - September 2nd, 2004, 4:08 am Post #30 - September 2nd, 2004, 4:08 am
    Salad is cerebral,people are,oh never mind.This is the first board I've been on that seems civil to people with different opinions.Let's just agree to disagree.

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